in medias res' Journal

3:26AM

Still alive.

(mind over matter)

12:10AM

My family is having a yard sale June 28. I'm supposed to be spending my free time going through my things to see what I want to sell. The weird thing is that when I first started looking, I didn't have much of anything to sell. Everything had a story behind it, and I wanted to keep the stories more than I wanted to keep the things. Each time I put something in the pile of things to sell, I feel like I'm breaking off a little commitment to my past, like selling the stuffed owl I got for having all A's in fifth grade or the sweater I wore the last time I saw my great-grandmother alive will make me miss those times less. It's making me feel unanchored and a little restless, and I've started to want to just keep going through and weeding out my possessions a little at a time. It makes me want to go somewhere loud and full of people I don't know, because it's hard to be anonymous when I'm surrounded with all this stuff.

Current mood: I don't know.

Current music: Coldplay "Yes"

(1 understand*mind over matter)

4:24AM

Sometimes I worry that I will sneeze and my front teeth will fly out of my mouth like Chiclets and I'll have to get dentures.

(1 understand*mind over matter)

4:49PM

I got a flu shot this year. Somehow, in spite of this, I seem to have the flu.

(1 understand*mind over matter)

1:11PM

This year hasn't been that great so far.

(9 understand*mind over matter)

12:51AM - If this isn't you, please accept my apologies and disregard this post

As long as we're publicly posting our issues, I'd like you to leave me alone, please. You're immature and ridiculous, and I want to have nothing to do with you. I said I'd leave you alone, and I removed you from my buddy list, facebook account, myspace, and phone.

Now why don't YOU leave ME alone?


P.S. It wasn't a "line" about having a date, and I don't care if it made you jealous or not. Get over yourself.

P.P.S. I didn't tell you to change your hair to "annoy" you. I told you to change your hair because it makes you look like an idiot. Maybe you can write a whiny emo song about this now, too.

(4 understand*mind over matter)

6:50PM

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Nadia. She was made of sugar, spice, and amazingness (oh, and all the normal human stuff, like blood or whatever). Years passed. Nadia got older. One year, on her birthday, she ignored the sage advice given to her by a local cat lady and refused to have a happy birthday. It was depressing, and sure, it could've been worse, but it still sucked. Oh, and as a result, a baby crawled off a cliff.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS THAT NADIA SHOULD HAVE A HAPPY BIRTHDAY (or else...)!

(mind over matter)

4:50PM

Today Alexandra and I went shopping. On our way back to Kelly House, this girl was holding up traffic, and the police officer behind her turned his siren on and off and started waving at her to get out of the way. I went, "Ohhhh, shazaam! Burned by a cop," and Alexandra said, "She got tollllllld." Then some random guy started laughing and was like, "YEAH!"

Then he walked away and it was weird...ly awesome.

(mind over matter)

2:19AM

So I took my video down because it made me feel awkward. I liked it, but I am probably in the minority.

Leeki: NoDoz is a central nervous system stimulant (basically, it's a low-dose caffeine pill). Each pill contains about the same amount of caffeine as a cup of coffee. It does not work. The makers of NoDoz suggest one pill (or less), but I ended up taking five because it wasn't working, and I still felt absolutely nothing.

(7 understand*mind over matter)

10:01AM

No-Doz no does. I took it this morning and all I feel is annoyed that I wasted money on that junk.

(mind over matter)

1:19AM

I need to be somewhere else.

(mind over matter)

9:59AM

Today I witnessed something very rare. I have only seen it one other time, and it amazed me just as much this time as it did then.

I saw a kittenfooter. It was amaaaazing. I walked behind him for almost five minutes in the interest of scholarship, but then he was just too slow and I had to go around him.


In other news, my overhead light blew out this morning in a flurry of blue flashes and loud popping sounds and, I am ashamed to say, I dropped faster than a psychic crackhead in a driveby. I don't know if I thought the architects across the alley were finally trying to pay me back for spying on them or what, but I was on the ground before the room was even dark. Awkwarrrrd.

(5 understand*mind over matter)

2:32PM

Today I stepped off the curb and onto a lacy thong that had been discarded in the gutter. No joke.

I also walked to class behind two guys discussing how one of their friends was "so smashed" last night that he peed on another one of their friends while the second guy was sleeping. The bad part is that the two guys in front of me knew that someone in their group had been peeing on people, but they didn't know who was doing it until last night. The peeing guy also ripped the side mirrors off of two parked cars.

(1 understand*mind over matter)

4:51PM

Today I fell down a flight of wet stairs. In the rain.

Then I got up, went to class in my soaked and muddy clothing, and gave a presentation while in a massive amount of pain.



September hates me.

(mind over matter)

6:02AM

(3 understand*mind over matter)

11:24PM

1. My dishwasher is leaking. This is not funny.

2. The building supervisor in charge of everyone in Kelly House lives directly below me. This is not funny.

3. The building supervisor, who looks like the guy that plays Hagrid in the Harry Potter movies, showed up at my door tonight to tell me that my dishwasher is leaking into his apartment, then stuck his entire head and upper body into my dishwasher to see why it won't work. Then, disgruntled (and with patches of his hair wet from the dishwasher), he left, after almost leaving his keys in my apartment. This is very funny.

(mind over matter)

12:44AM

I don't understand how weddings work for nudists.

(4 understand*mind over matter)

1:50PM

(1 understand*mind over matter)

4:34PM - It's creepy, but it might be working...

So. In an effort to lessen my hermitude, I have decided to make myself have a conversation (things like saying hi and giving directions not included) with a stranger every day for thirty days. I started four days ago, and I have to confess that I didn't realize how actually painful it is for me to force myself to talk when I don't really want to do so.

Day 1 (UNSUCCESSFUL): had one-sided conversation with random guy, received strange looks, seemed crazy
Day 2 (SUCCESSFUL): had actual conversation with three strangers, felt retarded and boring
Day 3 (SUCCESSFUL): had normal conversation with random girl in class, got partner for group work out of it
Day 4 (SUCCESSFUL): had brief conversation with random girl from class who studied in Spain for the summer, felt uncultured (but got homework assignment, which was initial reason for conversation)


I have to do this for twenty-six more days. Curse my stupid goals. I WISH I WANTED TO JUST STAY A HERMIT!

(4 understand*mind over matter)

7:48AM - Crashing Auditions and Talking to (HOT) Strangers

...


UNREAL.

Mitherbee and I went over to the American Idol auditions. Everyone auditioning had a little wristband bracelet thing, so I just covered my wrists and we followed everyone else. One of the security people said they were expecting somewhere between 20,000 and 30,000 people to show up to audition, and I definitely believe that number was pretty close to the actual number of people there. Even at 5:30 it was absolutely packed, so we just walked around and listened to people warming up and introducing themselves to each other.

When we were about to leave, we decided to sit down on a bench and watch people going in, and after about five minutes, these two guys came over and sat down near us. One of them was so...um...attractive that I couldn't even look directly at his face, because I was afraid my retinas would spontaneously combust. I'm not even kidding. I can describe his shoes and jeans in great detail (also his shirt, hands, hair, and mouth...um, can you say perfect teeth?). We started talking to them and found out that they signed up just to go through the line with their friend (each person auditioning only gets to have one guest), who "can sing for real, and is definitely going to make it," and that they drove down from Virginia (Navy), but couldn't find a hotel room within eighty miles, and had to bribe a woman working in a hotel to give them a dirty room so they could take showers. Mitherbee told them we were thinking about registering so we could go through the line, and Adonis* said they'd take us as their guests. Then we said no, and he said he was serious, and I wanted to, but I think that after at least five hours (the low ballpark of how long people would be waiting, from what we heard), he would've noticed that I was just staring at his feet. So then he started trying to hit on this completely random girl who was not at all what anyone who saw him would've expected him to like, and Mom said, "Oh, come on...she's last call at the bar, when your standards are lower!" His response? "I'm from Mississippi...my standards ARE lower." I am not even kidding.

Also, there were people in tuxes, cow costumes, billion-inch heels, glittery pageant dresses, drag, and tri-colored mullets (among other awesome oddities). One woman was curling her eyelashes, one girl (with a guy in a wig carrying a beach ball) had a giant glittery sun on a dowel, and one guy (dressed entirely in purple) was walking around talking into his cell phone about his "record deal" and how "this new recording company has offered [him] SO much more money than anyone else has." This seemed like it was just pretentious behavior until we saw him three more times in three different places, and he was having the same conversation each time.

I don't even really like AI, but the level of energy was amazing, and there was something very intriguing about how far some of those people had come to sit for hours in the Charleston heat, just to get five minutes (or less) with someone who, in most cases, is going to send them on their respective ways.




*Probably not his real name (although it should be), but I wouldn't know for sure, because I was afraid that if he said his name and I typed it here, just looking at it could make my laptop explode

(6 understand*mind over matter)